Monday, July 28, 2014

I Got a Legal Name Change...


If you follow me on Instagram, you'll know that a few months ago I expressed my desires to change my name (more specifically, my surname) and just moments ago, I shared my conformation that I submitted my application.

And, during the times that I expressed my desires, I got a few backlash from people about changing my name and honestly, that made me so angry.

As a little rant, I just want to say, you don't understand why I want to change my surname. I can explain why but you would never feel the way I feel about my name. Instead of lashing out on me, I wish these friends would've just supported my decision to change my name. And those that did, I'm extremely grateful for. Despite them not understanding my emotions, they can see it from my point of view and encouraged to do what makes me happy.

I wish I can say, a name is just a name, but that'll contradict what I just have done. As I paid my fees and left Vital Statistics Canada office, I was extremely happy and, beyond thrilled to have a new name.

I mean no disrespect towards my dad and ancestors for giving me my surname for the past 20 years, but to be perfectly honest, I was never happy with my name.

I didn't share all my reasons to why I'm changing my name to my friends but to my blog readers, here's the honest truth to why I chose to change my name:
  • I absolutely hate anything to do with Chinese. As racist as that sounds, I hate my last name because it's Chinese. Hated it from a very, very, young age.
  • From a young age up til now, I feel embarrassed when I tell people my name. 
  • I hate it when people go Jessica "Wuuuu-hooo". I will scratch your eyes out if you say that to me.
  • I've always had a thing for long(ish) names. 5 letters or more is attractive (but not too long)!
  • My ties with my family isn't that strong.
  • I'm extremely unhappy with my surname for a while. It wasn't out of the blue - I grew up sort of disliking it. 
I didn't change it for a professional advantage, or because I like a famous hockey player (hint hint of my new surname), I changed it for me. I figured, I am of legal age, I've been unhappy and embarrassed for so long, and I don't even know if I'm going to get married anytime soon. All I wanted was a surname that I was happy and proud of, despite that it has no historical background.

When I do get married, yes, I do plan on taking my future husband's name but until then, I'm extremely happy for my new legal name (in 8 week!) and screw those who lashed out against me for changing it.

If this makes me happy, accept it. If it goes against your beliefs (whatever that may be), shut your pie hole because my personal happiness and desires doesn't affect you.

10 comments:

  1. Totally agree with the hate-anything-to-do-with-Chinese bit. Both of my names are common "Cathy" and "Wang". It just seems so... ASIAN! And I freaking hate it. You go with sticking with what you want, Jess! And is your new name going to be Claire? Ya know, just from your instagram username?

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  2. I like Jessica, mostly probably because I'm so used to it and I don't consider Jessica to be an Asian name. Claire is actually my middle name, haha. I'm only changing my surname to a "white" name. I'll probably share the new name when my certificate of name change arrives in about 8 weeks or so :D

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  3. It's no one's business why you want to change your name. I personally think someone's name is very important, it's what people's first impressions are of you. People who say a name is just a name are wrong. Your name is part of your identity and if you're not comfortable with that, then you have the right to change it.

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  4. You definitely have a right to change your name. Regardless, you can't expect people around you not to judge. For a lot of people, surnames are highly valued. It's touchy subject when someone who is "ethnic" anglicizes it.

    Based on what I've read in this post, you seem to be insecure about your Chinese background for whatever reason(s). But you seem to happier now which is all the matters!

    Out of curiosity, what happens if you marry someone who is of Chinese descent? What if their last name was Wu?

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  5. Exactly! I'm more happier now with my (soon to be) new surname than of my birth surname!

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  6. I accept that I'm Chinese (nothing you can do about it, haha) but I honestly can't stand the culture, the language, majority of the food, etc. etc.. I don't know - my parents are Westernized since moving to Canada 25+ years ago so I had a Canadian upbringing rather than a traditional Chinese - I don't even speak the language or have a Chinese name! I think being Chinese but not being associated with anything Chinese made me feel this dislike towards the culture.



    I've never been attracted to Chinese people, even if they were born in America/deemed "white washed". The future can always change, but I don't see myself ever dating a Chinese person so the thought of having another Chinese name most likely wouldn't happen.

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  7. Ah, that clarifies a lot! Thanks for answering. It's good that you're upfront and honest about this. Good luck with the new name :D

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  8. I can definitely respect why you chose to change your name. It's something you have to live with for the rest of your life and therefore need to be comfortable with. I say if you've done something that makes you happy, then you don't even need to explain yourself!

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  9. Congratulations on the name change! I understand what you mean about hating your last name. Especially with Asian names and being in a non-Asian populated place, anyone with one is bound to have their names made fun of.. That was me all of elementary school. With all of your reasons, I really support your decision. Hopefully you will be happy with your new last name :). If people are going to go against your decision, let them. I wish you the best :)~

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  10. That's so rude of people to lash out of you without really understanding your reasoning behind making your decision. Changing your name is a huge deal, and they should have realized that you took the time and effort to treat it as such. Kudos to you for taking a huge step like this. A lot of people sit around and complain about certain aspects of their lives but never actually take the time to do something about it. The fact that you've been thinking about making this change for so long and you finally did says a lot about your personality! Congrats on the change! I hope it brings you happiness!

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